


Happiness

by faetrinkets



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Crowley Was Raphael Before He Fell (Good Omens), the aziraphale/crowley stuff is pretty subtle, thoughts about free will and happiness
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-29
Updated: 2019-06-29
Packaged: 2020-05-29 13:23:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 932
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19401190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/faetrinkets/pseuds/faetrinkets
Summary: There's an angel on the wall of Eden watching as the humans walk away with a flaming sword. Next to him sits a demon, watching also."I hope you're happy." The angel pouts, still annoyed.





	Happiness

Raphael spends a lot of his time in the stars; most of it, probably. He helped create the lot of them and he likes to keep an eye on how they're spinning along through the universe She made. They're lovely, he thinks, one of his better tasks.

Speaking of, he can't spend all of his time out in the galaxies and nebulae avoiding heaven or his responsibilities or his fellow archangels. There's been some minor upsets in the Host, disagreements between Gabriel and Michael and Lucifer that trickle down into the occasional squabble between lesser angels. it's all really quite needless, but Raphael is Her healer, and as such he is delegated to fixing up both the injuries to their celestial forms, but also to try and mend hurt feeling and bridge the gaps of disagreement. 

Lucifer is generally not very cooperative in these discussions. The Morning Star has been quite fed up with vague instructions and the whole God's Ineffable Plan thing. Raphael is a bit bothered by not fully understanding what's meant to happen as well, but he's not about to go shouting at Gabriel about it where the fledglings can hear and spread it about. Point being, "God works in mysterious ways" is not a terribly compelling argument when your issue is with the fact that you'd prefer a bit more clarity and less mystery. Not to mention that Lucifer is pretty put out by all the attention God has been giving Her newest creations.

It's after one of these fruitless discussions that Lucifer pulls him aside and starts putting all sorts of nagging questions in his head.

"Why should these humans be the ones she gives all her time to?" is how it starts, "what about them makes them better than any of the other creatures She's made? What about those creatures you or I have made? Beyond that, why should She create you as Her healer? Surely if She is all powerful She could just make it so no harm shall ever fall on Her creations." 

"The garden will keep them safe. They're happy there." Raphael responds, clearly avoiding addressing several of his brother's questions, "so long as they don't eat from the tree of Good and Evil, they'll never know hardship or pain."

"But will they know freedom?" and then he flies away, leaving that spinning in Raphael's head.

Surely freedom is not required if one is happy, right? And everyone is quite happy, anyway.

"Are you?" a voice cuts through Raphael's thinking; perhaps he'd muttered that last bit out loud.

"Pardon?"

"It's just, you frown quite a bit, don't you?" the angel points out, then flusters suddenly, "n-not that it's my place to be questioning what an archangel does with his face or anything else, otherwise. Um. I was asked to pass a message along to you from Michael. She. She, uh, she'd like to speak to you for a moment, if you've got one to spare. A moment, that is."

The angel is quite charming if a bit silly, stuttering about nervously. A round face framed by the palest of curls, bright blue eyes, rosy cheeks. He looks very much like what one might think an angel to look like, rather unremarkable next to any other standard angel truthfully. But no lesser angel has asked Raphael a question before, aside from passing messages along from his siblings. 

No angel at all has asked him if he was happy before, either.

Raphael looks up to the stars slowing spinning above them. He thinks maybe his happiness is out there.

"Tell her I'll be right over." he offers quietly, admiring a stunningly pink galaxy swirling overhead; a small shift of his fingers and the galaxy is threaded with clouds of red and purple.

"Oh. Oh my. That's quite lovely."

Ah, the angel hasn't left yet. Raphael turns to look at him again. He's looking upwards, admiring the stars about, the galaxy Raphael just altered. 

"You hung the stars?" The angel asks, but it's not really a question. "They're beautiful."

"Yes." Raphael responds anyway.

"Were-" He cuts himself off.

"Hmm?"

"Oh, well, um." The angel stutters and finally looks at Raphael again, gold eyes meeting blue, "It's just, were you happy when you made them?"

Raphael wants to look back up at the stars again, but he doesn't think he'll find the answer up there, after all.

"Or- are you happy now?"

"I'm doing my job" Raphael points out.

"Yes, but are you happy?"

And Raphael doesn't have the answer to that. The stars are lovely, but he feels a bit trapped between the creativity of making them and his ties to heaven and his work here. He waves the angel away, too tired to continue talking. He'll go find Michael in a bit.

\---

"Are you happy?" he asks Adam in the garden.

"What is that?" the human responds, and Raphael leaves without answering, not sure he knows the answer.

\---

There's an angel on the wall of Eden watching as the humans walk away with a flaming sword. Next to him sits a demon, watching also.

"I hope you're happy." The angel pouts, still annoyed.

The demon thinks of how much falling hurt, and of the anger Lucifer fills hell with, and what sort of mayhem he's signed up for. But he also thinks of choice, and freedom, and a wing held over his head to block the rain, and very blue eyes with a star out there in a matching shade and thinks, maybe now he has an answer to that question.

"Yes, I think so."

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first fic in this fandom so please go easy on me ;o;


End file.
